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Magic Mike Casts a Spell
By Patti Pfeiffer
Columnist's Note: The names contained herein have been changed to protect the once innocent.
Several of my friends are no more. Gone are the sane women I once knew. They've been transformed into out-of-control, weird-behaving beasts. And Mike's to blame.
I first heard of this Mike last week when I invited a friend in Houston to join me for a relaxing few days in East Texas.
"Only if we can see Magic Mike."
Clueless I inquired, "Who, or what, is Magic Mike?"
"Oh my God! You live under a rock!" she exclaimed before instructing me to Google it.
Not one to take orders, I instead asked someone who knows everything, or at least should, my editor. He shared his story of becoming aware of Mike while watching a TV interview wherein Matthew McConaughey described the pain associated with having pubic hair removed via waxing in preparation for his role.
Nah. No way. Really? I thought to myself. A movie? About a male stripper? McConaughey up-close-and-personal enough to require a Brazilian? Hmmm. That might be worth moving out from underneath a rock.
That was my introduction to Mike. The movie, Magic Mike, opened June 29 to the utter delight of females everywhere.
It's magical alright. It causes things to disappear in a flash: prim-n-properness, sanity, self-control and sistahs. In a matter of seconds my relatively rational buddies vanished, replaced by a bunch of foaming-at-the-mouth, sex-crazed, testosterone-charged, hot, wild, mad women.
Based on the true story of Channing Tatum, one of the actors in the movie, Magic Mike finished second at the box office during opening weekend.
Of course several of my friends were among the frenzy.
Leah called several times last Friday night, describing Ladies' Night Out, giving a blow-by-blow of unwinding events.
Along the way there was talk about buying fake dollar bills to toss at the screen. One woman wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes, certain she would be craving a smoke afterward.
Before the theater, this band of broads gathered for Happy Hour at the nearby Mexican restaurant.
"The bar was packed, about 200 people, and all but four were women," Leah shared. "The waiter asked if we were going to 'the movie.' When we confirmed his suspicions, he said 'yeah so is everyone else.' It was crazy."
This clan preferred a theatre in their local area. However, by Thursday all three close to their homes were sold out for Friday's showings. They were therefor forced to drive the distance in order to indulge.
"We got to the theater an hour and half before it started and there were already about 300 ladies in line. It was packed, about 600 people there.
"I didn't expect much of a plot but there was some. It was mostly eye-candy. Very nice eye-candy I might add."
I like eye candy.
"It was the craziest thing I've been to. There was a lot of whooping and hollering going on during the movie," Leah continued. "The crowd reaction reminded me of a Rocky Horror Picture Show. One woman sitting on the second row said she felt like she was having a lap dance."
I could fall for that.
Sara says it was indeed nuts in the theater. "They were into it so much I wondered if they realized it was just a movie and not a strip club. They were all 'normal' looking women ages 18-70. At the end one lady yelled out, 'We want to see more nakedness.' Like two hours wasn't enough."
Afterward, Sara analyzed the movie's appeal. "In the Bible Belt, ladies can't go to a strip club but they can go to the movie."
According to Leah, there were a few males in attendance. "A few poor husbands and two groups of gay guys."
Yes gays. The New York Times reported that homosexual men are "flocking to Magic Mike in numbers not seen since the release of Brokeback Mountain in 2005."
Go figure. Oh well, different strokes for different folks. This is news my rock residence should've shielded me from.
Other than the news, I don't watch television. I don't care much for anything that comes out of, lives in or is associated with Hollywood, LA and/or New York. So if the measure of a person's knowledge centers on television, movies, celebrity gossip, trivial information detailing the lives of the rich and famous, then I do indeed live under a rock.
But for the sake of journalism, I will force myself to move...and soon... to the inside of a theater. It's a sacrifice I am willing to make. After seeing Magic Mike, I'll probably relocate to a boulder.
Patti Pfeiffer is a Star Local News columnist, freelance writer and author. She may be contacted at pattip913@msn.com
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